Every new year brings a fresh start. But if problems and patterns from the past keep repeating, if addiction is a constant battle, if it’s hard to maintain sobriety, then self-sabotage may be the sneaky culprit.
What is self-sabotage?
Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary defines “sabotage” as: “destruction of property or the hindering of manufacturing by discontented workers; destructive or obstructive action; an act or process tending to hamper or hurt; deliberate subversion.” Addiction itself is a form of self-sabotage. Rather than dealing with painful emotions and events in healthy ways, it is often easier to turn to (more…)
Whether leading, helping those who are hurting, or serving in some other capacity, the strain of exposure to those suffering can lead to compassion fatigue. Here are some easy ways to recognize compassion fatigue when it starts and take steps to avoid—or eliminate—it all together.
- Know your limitations.
Recognize that everyone has a different emotional capacity to hold others’ pain and trauma. Each person must be aware of their unique threshold and know how it fluctuates depending on what is going on in their personal life. (more…)
Some of life’s biggest roadblocks are not the ones seen through the windshield. They are, instead, the roadblocks that fill the rearview mirror. It’s easy to get stuck in the past. But someone who keeps looking in the rearview mirror experiences their pain over and over. However, it is possible to make peace with the past and have hope for the future.
1. Accept the past.
Because every person is an imperfect human being who lacks perfect control over their thoughts, they may allow themselves to become stuck in the past—even though they know better. But the sooner they face reality, the sooner they will be able to move on. (more…)
Struggling with anxiety? If a person feels worried and stressed, they will often reach for food, alcohol, porn, drugs, shopping, or something else to help soothe and calm them. If left unchecked, anxiety can make someone turn to addiction to cope.
But there is a tool called a thought record that can reduce anxiety. A thought record can help people identify automatic negative thoughts and check to see if their thinking falls into one of the many distortions that increase stress, such as catastrophizing. How it works is that a person will write down an alternative balanced thought which states the truth.
For example, let’s say a person thinks that if they try to go to a Life Recovery Group to connect with others, it will be terrible. This would be an example of catastrophizing because they’ve already determined how something will be a disaster beforehand. (more…)
Many people excitedly set New Year’s resolutions every year, and losing weight is at the top of their list. But by the time February rolls around, most give up on their goals of getting healthier. Anyone can change their mindset and habits—when they do, they are much more likely to lose weight and finally live free.
- Develop a new way of eating.
Stuck in yo-yo dieting? Decide to stop dieting. Instead, eat real foods in moderation. And put an end to eating processed foods. There’s nothing wrong with indulging occasionally. But if an individual can’t stop eating unhealthy foods or consistently overeats, they’re in bondage. Make it a goal not to be mastered by anything this year.
- Develop a new way of moving.
One of the best ways a person can honor their Creator is by taking care of their body. 1 Corinthians 6:20 says, “You were bought at a price. Therefore, honor God with your bodies.” (more…)
What is justifiable resentment? And more importantly, how can someone get rid of it in their life?
Real resentment over real damage by a real person produces is what is known as justifiable resentment. It becomes such a massive part of a person’s life that it feels like a vulture sitting on top of them—a dark and dangerous presence that affects everything they do.
If the resentment were not justifiable, another person could talk them out of it. A friend could tell them things like:
- “Stop being so negative.”
- “Look at the bright side of things.”
- “Be more positive.”
But none of those things apply to someone with justifiable resentment because they have a reason to be resentful. They were a victim; it was not their fault. Anyone who knows of their terrible ordeal supports their feelings of resentment. Yet, that is the problem because no one questions their feelings. (more…)