It is God’s design for each person to be able to feel emotions and express them. Many people, however, never learned how to express their feelings on a deep level.
Why do some people numb their emotions rather than feel them? In their home growing up, children were probably seen rather than heard. Their parents did not help them process their feelings. Anger was met with rage, fear went unacknowledged, and there was plenty of shame to go around. So, they numbed their difficult emotions by turning to something like eating, shopping, watching pornography, or other things.
Does this sound familiar? Instead of numbing feelings, take out a journal and try the Comfort Circle exercise. (more…)
Love is something everyone longs for. It’s normal for one to want — even crave — a close, loving relationship. However, some people with an insecure attachment style are prone to wanting to be in a dating relationship, even if it is unhealthy, abusive, or toxic. Although relationship addiction isn’t recognized as an official diagnosis, mental health experts and researchers generally agree on a few key signs that suggest cause for concern in a dating relationship.
Here are some signs of relationship addiction to be watching out for. (more…)
Is the baggage from the past getting heavy? Put it down! Baggage from past relationships, trauma, and childhood gets carried into the present until it is dealt with. This emotional weight strains a person’s mental, emotional, spiritual, and relational health. Can God make a way to leave the heavy baggage behind? Yes. Here are six steps to take to lighten the load.
- Agree with God that there’s a problem from the past, and confess it.
No one can overcome an issue until they acknowledge it. There’s a reason for every feeling—anger, joy, or bitterness. God’s word for “agree” is the word “confess.” To confess something means to agree that it is true. When it comes to baggage that is bothering an individual, they must recognize that things have gone wrong – either done to them or done by them – and agree with God or “confess,” that they have happened and affected them deeply. (more…)
Can anyone ever completely figure out love? No, because the mysteries of love and how to make it work baffle even the most well-intentioned individual. From parenting to marriage, friendship to business relationships, most find their best efforts often fail, and disappointment finds its way into their most valued sphere of life.
Why is this? It all comes down to a basic orientation in how one views themselves and others. In other words, since Adam, people have been looking out for number one, which is the surest way to destroy a relationship. People tend to think of themselves first instead of the relationship itself. They are trying to get what they want instead of seeing the needs of others. And because of this self-orientation, they destroy all chances of getting what they want and need, which is love. (more…)
The holidays are supposed to be the season to be jolly. But for anyone who comes from a toxic family, it can be painful. Is it possible to prevent the emotional pain of spending time with family members? Yes. Instead of fear or fighting, it can be a time of comfort and joy.
Begin by letting go of any unrealistic expectations. For example, it is unrealistic to think, “It would be wonderful to spend two weeks with my ex-spouse, kids, grandkids, and our pets all in one house. What could possibly go wrong?”
It is more realistic to set boundaries by limiting time spent together, learning to say no when necessary, and discussing plans beforehand. Communicate boundaries in a way that is firm but respectful. (more…)