The Fruits of Forgiveness in Recovery

The Fruits of ForgivenessWe made a list of all we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all. – Step Eight

It’s easy to feel like we want to give up when we get to Step Eight in Life Recovery, right? Many of us struggle in recovery when it comes to forgiveness. Whether we struggle with chemical dependency or codependency, we all need to work through forgiveness if we want to find healing.

Forgiveness is a choice. No matter how much someone hurt us, we can still choose to forgive them. But forgiveness is a one-sided decision that does not have to involve the other person. So we can forgive someone for hurting us, but that does not mean we have to reconcile with them. (more…)

Why Doesn’t God Fix Everything?

One fatal day, Job lost everything – his wealth, children, and even good health.

Job cried out to God by asking some challenging questions. In Job 3:11, he asked: “Why wasn’t I born dead?” In other words, Job questioned why God allowed him to go through such intense suffering.

Can you relate? Perhaps the unthinkable happened to you. You might have been emotionally, physically, or sexually abused as a child. Or, maybe you were betrayed on the deepest level when your spouse had an affair and abandoned you. Now you turn to food, drugs, sex, shopping, alcohol, or another addiction to numb your pain. You’ve prayed for God to heal you by taking away your pain. (more…)

Rebuilding the Bridge Called Trust

The old covered walking bridge across the Delaware River had stood for as long as anyone could remember. It connected the town of Portland, Pennsylvania with Columbia, New Jersey. One year during the spring, ice flows combined with a large amount of rain and the swollen river washed away part of the bridge and weakened what remained.

Trust between people is like a bridge built from both sides of a river. When it is built with care and careful planning, it will be durable — capable of weathering the storms of life. Occasionally it will need repair and require periodic maintenance; but individuals in a trusting relationship will feel safe putting a great deal of their emotional weight on the bridge — it’s where keeping one’s promises is expected; sensitive secrets divulged are carefully protected; and personal flaws and weaknesses are accepted. (more…)