Choose Friends Who Strengthen Your Character—Not Harm It

Choose Friends Who Strengthen Your Character—Not Harm ItThe dictionary defines “friend” as “a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard.”

This definition is accurate, as far as it goes. But when one examines the deeper meaning of friendship, many more descriptors come to mind such as trustworthiness, loyalty, helpfulness, kindness, understanding, forgiveness, encouragement, humor, and cheerfulness, to mention but a few. A trusted friend can help someone discover God’s unfolding purposes for their life. Seek a friend who is wise, honest, and encouraging.

Suppose one genuinely wants to strengthen one’s character. In that case, one must build closer relationships with people who want to do the same. (more…)

Warning Signs Our Life is Unmanageable

Warning Signs Our Life is UnmanageableLife was smooth until addictions, habits, and unhealthy patterns came across our path. Then before we knew it, suddenly, the road became bumpy. We must be careful. As Proverbs 27:12 says, “A prudent person foresees danger and takes precautions. The simpleton goes blindly on and suffers the consequences.”

To divert disaster, here are the warning signs that our life has become unmanageable.

1. Denying We Have a Problem.
Denial keeps us from addressing the things we can change, causing us to think that our inability to change everything means we can’t change anything.”—Steve Arterburn

One of the biggest signs we have a problem is that we are living in denial. Yet, if we admit we have a problem and are willing to work through it, our admittance will propel us forward in recovery.

2. Blaming Others.
One way to see if our life is becoming unmanageable is whether we blame others. It’s easy for us to put responsibility for our problems onto other people, right? But there’s a better way: Admit that someone else’s huge, enormous, too-big-to-be-missed problems does not eradicate our need to deal with our issues. (more…)

Top 10 Traits of Unsafe People

Top 10 Traits of Unsafe PeopleAre you tired of attracting unsafe people? When you start to surround yourself with safe people, you will form healthier relationships. David put it this way, “Oh, the joys of those who do not follow the advice of the wicked, or stand around with sinners, or join in with mockers,” (Psalm 1:1).

If you want to attract safe people, you must take steps to become a safe person yourself. Also, you will need to identify whether someone is safe. To help you, here are the top ten traits of unsafe people. (more…)

Bonding and Boundaries: Why You Need Them Both

Bonding and Boundaries: Why You Need Them BothFrom the moment we take our first breath, we need a healthy bond with our parents. When we are hungry, our parents feed us; and if we fall, they pick us up. This secure connection sets the stage for healthy relationships in the future. By having a secure attachment, we feel seen, heard, and understood.

As we get to be older, we go off to school and learn how to develop relationships with others. And at the end of the school day, we come back home to our parents and hopefully get our needs met. This bond gives us the stability to learn to separate from unhealthy people and relationships. It can also help us to develop boundaries.

What if we did not form a strong, healthy bond with our parents? (more…)

How to Form Healthy Relationships

How to Form Healthy RelationshipsHe who seeks a friend without a fault remains without one.” – Anonymous

Do you have a fear of abandonment? Were you hurt at a very young age? Is it hard for you to form safe, secure relationships? If so, it may be keeping you from bonding with others.

You want to have healthy relationships; yet, you are frightened and scared and pull away. Also, are you tired of trying to form new relationships because you always get hurt? Here are three tips to help you form healthy attachment in relationships. (more…)