When counselors get together and discuss the struggles and difficulties of helping people, one question that frequently comes up is this: “Who is working harder — the counselor or the client?” If the counselor is working harder than the client, chances are the client isn’t going to experience any real change.
The same is true for groups. If the support group and its members are working harder than an attendee who says they want help, there is slim chance that attendee will see change. Neither a counselor nor a group can do the work of recovery for someone.
That begs a question we each have to answer: Who’s working your recovery?
Is your counselor putting more energy into your recovery than you are? Is he or she the one driving the conversation and trying to motivate you? If your counselor wasn’t asking you questions to help you dig deeper, would you be asking them of yourself?
And what about your group and accountability partners — are they working harder at your recovery than you are? Do they make more calls to you than you do to them? Are they asking difficult questions that you should be answering for yourself well in advance of group? Are they more concerned with your integrity than you are?
Or perhaps your spouse – are they working harder than you are? Are they hounding you about being accountable for your time, money, relationships, work, etc.? Maybe they’re doing that because you aren’t working very hard at it yourself.
Ultimately, we have to answer for our own recovery. We are the ones God is calling to go to the next level. Do yourself and those who care about you a favor, and step up your game. Be the one working your own recovery!